This is the first review in a one-off bonus series covering the items in a Snack Crate subscription box, which found its way to my parent’s mailbox. For more details on this, check out the introductory post.

Here, Snack Crate has provided us with our first instance of “candy culture shock”: assuming you grew up in the U.S., these are not what you think they are. Just ask my wife, who took me up on my offer for a “Smartie” and was immediately disappointed when she ate the result of that generous offer. (Apparently she didn’t look at the candy before eating it…)

As a note for those that may not know, Smarties here in the U.S. are that sugary, powdery, circular, vaguely “fruit flavored” (for lack of a more correct term) candies that are a mainstay of Halloween and children’s parties everywhere. Well, if that’s what you want, don’t ask for them by that name in Canada: there, they are also circular candies, but covered in a crispy coating with a chocolate center, a la the chocolate candy that also shares the name of a famous white rapper (“G-Eazy’s”?). Furthermore, they are manufactured by a little, family-owned chocolate company that goes by the name of Nestle.

These are okay as a curiosity, but not one of my favorite findings of the bunch. For starters, the exterior coating is much thicker and crunchier than the “white rapper” candy here; personally, I like being able to suck on the American candies, which slowly releases the flavor of the chocolate center as the crunchy shell disintegrates. You could probably do the same with these, but it takes a little longer for the shell to disintegrate, and just isn’t the same “enjoyable” experience. The chocolate on the inside tastes a little different, too—maybe it’s a little sweeter—but is still every bit as unimpressive as its American doppelganger, tasting like a mass-produced, C-grade chocolate.

They aren’t bad, nor really all that good; the type of candy you’d get as an impulse buy at the checkout counter, but that you wouldn’t normally seek out on your own.

RANDOM NOTE: After seeing that Smarties are produced by the Smarties Candy Company (family-owned; I was expecting them to be a part of a huge candy conglomerate) in the U.S., with an additional factory in Canada, I was interested to see how they’re marketed in Canada to prevent confusion with this candy. And thanks to good ol’ Wikipedia, I now have the answer: they’re called “Rockets”. So now you know: if you want the American Smarties in Canada, ask for “Rockets”. You learn something new every day, eh?

RATING: 5/10. These aren’t your American Smarties! Instead, these are small, circular discs of chocolate with a crunchy outer shell, similar to the ones imprinted with an “M” on each one here in the States. They’re also every bit as uninspiring, although the candy exterior is thicker and stronger here, while the chocolate in the middle is every bit as ho-hum as its American counterpart.