Is there any one pastry that sums up the childhood of most children quite like a toaster tart? Obviously, that’s not the trademarked name (which I will avoid mentioning even though I’m sure it’s covered under fair use, but I’m not a lawyer and we’ll just err on the side of caution), but pretty much every kid has had at least a few dozen of these through the years, in some form or another. It might just be the “perfect” pastry, at least in terms of mass-produced breakfast foods are concerned.
Anyway, the first thing we notice after cracking open the box: that trademarked silver foil, complete with image and text describing the flavor variety. I can’t be for certain if these are on the national brand toaster pastry, but they are on every store brand one that I’ve had, which gives me good reason to believe that they are all from the same factory—and it’s probably the same one that makes the name brand toaster tarts.
And as such, this one looks, feels, and tastes a lot like every other brown sugar and cinnamon toaster tart that I’ve had – and that’s not a bad thing. I do feel like the pastry itself is a little softer than some other brands, but that’s just going off relatively distant memory (of, like, two months, which feels “distant” when you hit your thirties), so maybe I’m remembering incorrectly. Either way, the “tart” part itself is, like I just said, very soft, and carries the hard-crust icing very well. The filling is exactly what you’d expect: very sweet, but slightly counterbalanced by the dryness of the pastry, especially in the pointless area that I call the “crust”: the four edges of the pastry, where there not only isn’t even the slightest hint of icing, but not the slightest hint of filling, either. (I always remember dreading coming up to those bites as a kid, a feeling that I still get today, although to a much smaller degree.)
This might be too much sweetness for some, and I might be biased with my sweet-leaning tastebuds, but I honestly think the vast majority will have no issues with it. Besides, you’ve probably had many of these before, so you already know what to expect.
Really, I think the main difference between private label versions of these sweet pastry treats all come down to price: at Meijer, an 8-pack of these cost $1.59 when not on sale. That’s not quite as good as Kroger’s $1.25 for the same count box, nor Aldi, who offer up 12 for $1.65. However, all those options are better than paying $2.49 for the 8-count box of the national brand (when not on sale).
Overall: 7.5/10. These are some tasty toaster treats that more or less taste like every other major store brand toaster tart; methinks it’s because they’re all from the same factory (the wrappers all have the same design on them), but that’s just a hunch so don’t go parading it around as fact. Anyway, the pastry itself is soft, while the rest is what you’d expect: a hard, crunchy icing gives way to just the right amount of brown sugar and cinnamon goodness in the middle.