You are currently viewing Elevation Cookies and Cream Functional Protein Bars (Aldi)
I don't understand...

Elevation Cookies and Cream Functional Protein Bars (Aldi)

Well we’ve got some more protein bars to take a look at, because for being a store with limited inventory, Aldi seems to have plenty of shelf space dedicated to “diet” products. There are protein shakes, protein bars, meal replacement shakes, meal replacement bars and multiple choices of each…enough to cover an entire endcap. This seems a little weird to me (why not have one or two different protein bars instead of 10), but I’m sure they have more advanced data that defends their decision. Meanwhile, we get one or two special buy energy drinks every year. Whatever. 

Even though I have no dietary reasons for using these products, I still try them from time to time. Why? Because they’re available. I like nibbling on something while I’m at work, and while many taste like absolute crap, they’re still somewhat filling, at least for an hour or two. Hey, it’s better than working on an empty stomach! Let’s dig in and see if this is worth your hard-earned money, shall we?

Texturally, we’re looking at the same type of consistency as virtually every other protein bar on the market. Admittedly, it doesn’t look that bad right out of the packaging, with a generous helping of cookies over a “cream” center, but there’s something lost in the translation between appearance and taste.

Individual wrapper for Elevation Cookies and Cream Functional Protein Bar, from Aldi
At least the packaging is somewhat enticing.

This is cookies and cream, right? Because I’m getting a distinct flavor that’s more in line peanut butter than either cookies or cream. The scent does nothing to help verify this flavor, with an aroma that’s closer to building material than edible food. Seriously, I can’t place my finger on what it smells like…is it tar? Whatever it is, I like it, but it’s a smell that no edible product should have. (My wife, on the other hand, thought it smelled like a no-bake cookie. Which I hate.) The cookies are there in the form of a low-grade chocolate taste, which hits the tastebuds like that chocolate syrup crap. That’s still a better showing than the cream, which is nowhere at all to be found.

Some food products get better the further in you go, but this is not one of those products. If anything, it keeps getting less and less appetizing with each bite. The peanut butter becomes more pronounced, and manages to overpower the rest. This would be more tolerable in a peanut butter and chocolate bar, but in one billed as cookies and cream? It’s a no-go.

Factor in the price – $4 for four bars – and you have something that doesn’t need to exist. But since it does, at least you have the option to never buy it. 

Overall: 3/10. They’re expensive – expected of a protein bar – and don’t taste all that great – also to be expected of a “health” bar. But what’s unexpected is just how far Elevation takes the creative licensing of flavor: This tastes nothing at all like cookies and cream. Instead, it’s more similar to a peanut butter and chocolate combination, with the taste of cookies only showing in the form of artificial chocolate flavor. That’s more than the nonexistent cream gets.

This Post Has 2 Comments

  1. Rick

    These bars are made for people who want 20-30 grams of protein and don’t have time for anything else or as an add on to a meal. Athletes,weight lifters ECT . If you want taste you don’t buy protein bars . Eat a granola bar. You are going to sacrifice taste for protein. That is a fact. In order to make it taste better they are going to add crap that defeats the purpose of eating it For one dollar a bar it’s the best deal in town. You seem to need a bit of education on what their intended use is .

    1. atom

      And you provided me the information necessary to complete my studies in functional protein bars. Thank you for that knowledge that I will graciously carry with me until the day I die.

Leave a Reply